Mall Trash

Tuesday 30 September in About by Funtime Ben

The funniest part about growing up in Manhattan is that many things people outside deeply urban areas experience, I find exotic. As people coming to the _big city_ enjoy rides in elevators, because they seem exotic if you don’t ride them daily… when you ride them daily it becomes standard.

I like malls.

They’re kind of exciting. Huge monstrosities, built to capture the senses, entice the appetite, and empty the purse. It is the cultural counterpart of the casinos in Vegas. A world where time stops and direction becomes skewed.

Being that my favorite activity is people watching, malls are like _methamphetamines_ for the senses. A smorgasbord of bad hair and tasteless teens, roving like packs of hideously dressed wolves searching for other packs of teens. They swarm about food-courts, talking to each other, passing nervous glances to the other opposite sex groups across the fod-court hugging closely to a Cinnabon.

It eventually becomes overwhelming. The visual pollution, while intoxicating, begins to overwhelm the senses. It begins with a sale sign in the wrong shade red and then the garish reality of your surroundings begins, much like too much sugar, to eat away at you sanity.

It’s a uniquely American experience. Like pecan pie, Fluff, Peanut Chews, and conformity. A representation of truth and the american dream, all laid out for purchase.

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  1. ReeRee Says:

    You should see the malls in LA - Very fancy.
    Who ever thought there would be a Tiffany’s at the mall?? Holly Golightly would be livid, I’m sure.

  2. Lisa Says:

    I feel kind of guilty. I grew up in the suburbs and was one of those tasteless teens at the mall. It should have become standard, like elevators to a Manhattanite, but I still find them fascinating and exotic. It’s a lot like watching “Jenny Jones,” er, I mean a PBS documentary on the cultural intricacies of life in middle America. Yeah, that’s it…