Hold the Mayo
Wednesday 17 September in Everyday by Funtime BenWhen I was younger, 8 or 9, I used to think that mayonnaise had some sort of preserving feature. I thought people smeared that disgusting white stuff all over their sandwiches, because it protected the bread from getting soggy from the tomato. It was like bread paint.
*A protective barrier, if you will.*
When I later learned that is was smeared on sandwiches for flavor, I was utterly at a loss. Why would you voluntarily smear an opaque gel across you perfectly tasty sandwich? For years after I forbade it from ever touching a sandwich of mine. Finally, at age 14, I accepted mayonnaise into my life, because I discovered the joys of Ham & Swiss.
Now, I enjoy a little mayo on my sandwiches. A splash of the low fat variety, is a treat I do indulge in. I’m not a over-indulger by any means, if I take a bite of a sandwich and mayo begins to squirt out the other side… I have to perform a moyodectomy (smear the excess on the bag).
Funilly enough, it was when I was 18 I realized, from a lengthy examination of a “Hellmann’s”:http://www.mayo.com/ bottle, that mayo also doesn’t contain dairy. I just assumed. White stuff, other than “Fluff,”:http://www.marshmallowfluff.com/ equals some sort of dairy product. It doesn’t.
*I checked.*
September 18th, 2003 at 8:41 am
Although it contains no dairy, I learned that you must stick it in the fridge. Eggs. And what are you talking about?, no protective barrier, that’s a secondary usage at least.
September 18th, 2003 at 11:36 am
I just liked thtat you worked “funnily” in a sentence.
September 19th, 2003 at 2:02 am
It is pretty much just eggs and oil - you could easily make it at home. Who would want to? Disgusting for the most part but yes, a little bit mixed with some nice mustard on a ham and cheese and you have got your self a little heaven sandwich.
September 19th, 2003 at 9:30 am
Rita, you’re a heaven sandwich.
September 20th, 2003 at 9:29 pm
mayo is the best thing i ever heard of on a sandwich whether it be a protective barrier or not. i LIKE it to squeeze out the end of the sandwich…especially if you happen to be in europe and they HAND MAKE the mayo. it’s like heaven. HEAVEN i say.
September 23rd, 2003 at 11:30 am
Mayonaise can taste good. In Belgium and the Netherlands they make a variation called fritessaus - it has a splash of vinegar I think - and an enjoyable flavor. And of course there is the delicious aioli - garlic mayonaise.
And yes, I am glad to be spending part of my Tuesday morning defending the flavor of mayonaise.
September 23rd, 2003 at 12:55 pm
That’s alright, I spent Wednesday writing this entry.
September 24th, 2003 at 6:38 pm
I say this merely because I care: mayo is the work of Satan. Those who eat mayo and espouse its virtues make Baby Jesus weep.
Embrace mustard. Preferably spicy.
November 18th, 2003 at 2:11 pm
Would you please let know the exact meaning of
HOLD THE MAYO.
Please check my web log you will find it intersting.
Ebi Mod